User Profile

The details of my life are quite inconsequencial. My father was a relentlessly self improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant fur buggery. My mother was a 15 year old French prostitute named Chloë with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess in the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we would make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 i received my first scribe. At the age of 14 a Zoroastrian named Wilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorned scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

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